12.22.96

i cannot feel
i cannot be touched
i cannot dream
for my dreams become real
i cannot tell
i cannot keep
my secret guilt forever will be
there is no escape
no home
no neutral place
everywhere i look i see his face
the walls know all
but they do not dare speak
i know not where i go
i am my defeat
i’m scared of what won’t be
and cry
tear after tear
of what is breathing
inside and all around me