i cannot feel circles and circles i have pretended lost beneath voices of familiar faces crossing tears broken strings like a child release me stop asking these questions tonight he saw me let it go pictures of you magic kisses i have walked down these roads i always wanted to believe there were times i thought i knew it all hollow fears i'm not waiting for you take me back tell me stories i've tapped into a perosonality pretend to see me through my eyes notice me for one fucking time just tell me to stop another story if you told me what to say i want to wash away



11.5.97

i always wanted to believe i meant more to you than these
i always wanted to believe youíd stop killing me in threes
i always wanted things you did not desire
i always wanted to add heat to the fire
but rest assure i got your message
rest assure iím not your little whore
you could not have made me feel anymore rejected
than those times i laid untouched by you naked
you kiss me gently
then bite me harder
you whisper to me
then silence me louder
now i want to stop feeling anymore
now i want to slam the mother fucking door
just stop beating inside
just stop the replaying of time
your selfish grin has always made you win
you could never be without
to ever know what it is to have a drought
you fill yourself with passing glances
surfacing shallow graves of momentary chances
but donít you get it
donít you ever see
you feel nothing without having something
youíre weak to think youíre strong
but one day youíll look back and see
the warmness that grew from inside of me
there was more than friendly dances
there was more than short broken up romances
something special has been made
something that doesnít pass by everyday